I was completely prepared to enjoy last night’s Ravens/Falcons match-up. NFL action on Thursday night, I can handle that. Cracked open the beer, sat back, turned on the game and was instantly annoyed.
Joe “stroke my ego” Theismann had found another job as one of the commentators announcing the game. How did I miss this? Why didn’t I hit the mute bottom prior to the game?
In what has become all too common in the broadcast industry “no talent ass clowns” like Theismann are plugged in commentary positions on the perception that they will draw a greater audience. The NFL Network’s Thursday game trio of Bob Papa, Matt Millen, and Joe Theismann is just brutal.
- The well known New York play-by-play man Papa holds his ground, but too often gets caught up in the uncomfortable back and forth analysis by Theismann and Millen.
- Although Millen was a horrible GM, he has always excelled at providing a simple, blue collar player way of explaining the game.
- But… it is all too palpable that Little Joe’s ego has no place in the room.
Right from the start Theismann had difficultly formulating complete sentences and distinguishing the Ravens from the Raiders. Knowing that he had scored lower than Millen on the network’s English hiring exam, you could see Little Joe fighting throughout the night to inject and justify his relevancy for being in the booth.
This is nothing new for Theismann, who has had a tough time justifying any broadcast job he has held in recent years. Let us not forget that nice blow to his ego when ESPN canned him from Monday Night Football after deciding Tony Kornheiser’s words were more valuable then Little Joe’s. Ouch.
The saddest thing about Theismann’s game commentary is that it is about as stimulating as milking a cow. During one head turning moment in the 2nd quarter, Theismann decided to reach deep into the recesses of his mind and wow the audience.
He described the Falcons’ attempts to get the running game going again by proclaiming, “You’ve gotta get those offensive lineman all lathered up again.”
Really Joe??? Lathered up??? That is the best you could come up with?
Theismann the player is someone I think everyone can accept. Statistically his numbers are similar to top quarterbacks of the era and he helped lead the Redskins to two Super Bowls, winning one. That said Little Joe admittedly has always been cocky and egotistical…great qualities for a pro quarterback, but less than appealing for a commentator. This is especially so when your work colleagues aren’t willing to pander to your football celebrity.
So, I’m asking, no begging the NFL Network to CAN THIS CLOWN!! At least then Theismann might embrace a full life of retirement and have adequate time to lather up all the things he loves.